好像还很久-20

我回到了家，可是心却还在那儿~

好像有点早回来，刚开始却停着~

不明白状况，似乎有或不得~

但就是觉得每次都，依依不舍~

说好的约定，好像还很久 :(

Engineer

I did ever tell my fren, actually working as engineer is an easy job,
i further explained " just using 1 formula with arimethic
way can solve many questions ", then she was surprised " that easy ah ?
i should be the engineer also ~~" Actually it sounded like a doctor
also an easy job, just give panadol can cure the sick ..

In fact, we need lot of knowledges and experiences to design or
solve the current issues , understanding and application of information
is different story...or information from others, especially suppliers...do u
believe it exactly ? then tell the clients the way they told u ? it's risky
and bias ....to be a profesional engineer...ahhhh ~~ need to study a lot !!
Not only using 1 formula...but every single part of the design must be
mastered ~~

Am i happy working in this company ? Working ot every night, sometimes
might sacrifice weekend to work to complete part of my jobs..i do still
enjoy the process of learning and catching up as much as im able...maybe
im still very fresh, since the company giving me so many opportunities
to learn and practice, it's quite exciting and challenging for every single step
or person whom i face with.

Im sent to meeting, a young guy with this kinda hair style surely sometimes
noticeable, if im client, seeing this fella come meeting with me, and have
no experiences at all, surely i will scold and ask him to get back office
and send another profesional engineer to see me, because i paid for consultation.
Fortunately, havent really met these clients. But what to do ? I dont blame
them if im being scolded, they are just curious of my services, and need
to know more, is my problem cant give any helping hand.

Last post , i was still excited writing about my master programme. 4 months
later, everything seem have changed. Huu...~~ i did share it with her, then
she said " it's maybe God set the path for you, He knows what u need
to do~"

1st day, i changed mind on 1st day, my respectful senior came to talk to me,
tat moment i was really in worry, felt so down..then told him my situations
of taking mater programme, he did give good suggestions to me ...next day,
i was talking with another new fren, he mentioned about current company
which he rejected to work for, but actually the salary and conditions
offered was really not bad, it's really interesting. 3rd day, i applied it
through a fren, and i alraedy knew i surely could get it. I also not sure why i
had that confidence ~ i went to the interview without cutting my long hair,
and boss was not really mind of that. He even told me " b4 u came for
interview, i already employed you~ " In 3 days, i changed my 2 months plan,
and got it all.

Even my living place, also not bad, very close to office, haha...just 1 minute
drive only. Met with nice housemates...they are frenly and active talking..
'same odor' ...hahah ~~

Here really thanks God who has this well plan for me, He also even solved
a lot of my working problems, sometimes really out of my control, even
my colleague also said " God has answered your prayer"...^_^
but as God told me b4, now my heart is like a upside down bottle, He couldnt
fill anything into me...i know the truth, but the doubt is still there, i never
hope God appears in my dreams , and explains to me, because the answer
is already in the Bible...

writing so long, actually i have more to say....let's it in another blog...
i feel tasty when i read my old blogs...it's better to jot down something
'everything' i have done...next blog let's talk about dreams...Music -Guitar ~~

Hope i grow up as planned , and be equipped as a professional engineer
with a great title " IR"

A life with guitar....A new target of dream ~~

Maybe i didnt make it clear of recent update, let's say about it again ~

I've ended the part time job working at Konica Minolta, the period
offered was only one month. Even though quite short, but i did learn
something and exposed to other working field. It was my first part time,
first time earned money myself also. Later i will upload the photos with
ex colleagues and explain the characteristics and company system which
i observed for a month. Hahaha ~~

I'm now in the lab, working as a research assistant, but in fact , nothing
to do with lab works. I'm just concentrating doing my master programme
topic, where it has been started unofficially. I'm not as lucky as another
master student, could get offer from another lecturer, paid very high
stipend ( higher than an engineer ), and can skip the fee. I'm actually
worried of it ...-_-! So in these 4 months, i must have achieved something
to show to my supervisor ~~

in the morning just realized jason returned the Boss Super Chorus to me,
about 1 month after the gig, i didnt open the box to play~ i didnt stop playing,
but just touch the acoustic guitar. Recently, dunno why i like hearing , find
the notes by ears, that feels enjoying . Slowly to stop using gtp ~~

actually some frens did ask me ..." what is ur next collection ?" ...


Compressor ? An effect used to regulate the sound wave and sustain, suitable for funk and jazz in clean sound .












Loop Station ? A recorder , it might give more inspiration by the rythmm loop i think so






Vox Big Bad Wah ?
A new modern of wah where includes vintage tone and great designed by
Joe Satriani.

Why not a good guitar ? I'm using Ibanez RG series, it was around RM1480,
purchased from Bently guitarshop 3 years ago. It was good looking with the
silver steel plate on guitar , where you may see the reflection of the colorful light
on the stage.

I do still remember the sound of the guitar at the 1st time , ah foo helped me
tested a lot ibanez low range guitars ..haha ~~ he could describe the tone
and sound of every guitar with funny and nice words . But actually all i heard
seem no difference at all, distortion or clean for every just same. When tried
on this guitar , i felt this guitar seems got bit temper, the voice seems
quite angry at that time compared to other ibanez guitars.
Thats how i feel it's rock , and the price also affordable . Finally, i brought it home
on that day.

Last December, i changed the pickup, it has enhanced and fully boosted the
potential of guitar to the max. The price of the pickup is almost half price of the
guitar...haha ~~ mmm...why change ah ? every guitarist sure telling u need to
change the pickup , a lot of reasons given . Everytime i buy or change something
new is becoz i experience and realize the importance of certain instruments .
The pickups are Dimarzio LiquiFire and Crunch Lab which designed by John Petrucci, i did feel so excited when i heard it after the 'revolution'.
It sounds clearer, stronger tone , and the mid is higher than before.

But since it's still a low range guitar, im always desired to have another one ,
feels great to see and listen to other guitars .

Ahh...~ a dream of guitar....a new target of life ~~

A life with guitar ~~ A dream of music ~~

Just knew someone would read my blog, so this has
motivated me to write something more of my thoughts or
opinions of my daily life .

Recently, i've been moving around the PJ , before this,
i've made decided to move to seri petaling to stay with my
aunt and sis. But after living quite a moment with my pals,
at the living room , i found out actually the environment is
not the factor for me to feel comfortable, but people who
i live with.

Last 2 years, i had been living in a big single room alone,
though room was big , but i didnt find it's as warm as
i stayed in college, just too lonely in the room . Like a
rich man without a friend at an island for 2 years ~~~( hAHAHA)

this weekend, i'm going to move again to my sifu's room for
temp, just because i'm gonna wait the appeal to the colleges.
This might sound a bit funny or insane , i've finished my
uni life, why should i go back to that place ? hope i can get
it ...~~

Here is the update of the gig's video ( copy wat yun fei did ),
u guys can watch all of these videos here without any links ~

Here are the songs flow :
1. Opening
2. Glamorous Sky
3. 我的时间
4. Without You
5. Hello

1.


2.


3.


4.


5.


Although played badly, still not feeling to quit ~~

A life with guitar ~~ A dream of music ^_^

Update

Everyone thought i didnt on the line, actually i was stalking behind the screnes,
just kept quiet for every manners and cases...read blog and facebook post
without replying, maybe is the mind feeling quite tired after working, didnt
want to think so much, just felt better use the time to play guitar and games..
this is how i appreciate my time every night.

I'm now working part time at a company named " Konica Minolta ", got the offer from
internet, without any interview, a long hair guy could work in this big company,
with so much weird feelings from others. The duration is only for 1 and half
month, so im gonna end soon, quite happy for that, coz my job is calling customers
everyday, taking orders and sometimes being scolded by customers. People
worked in my department just said " sudah biasala ~~" ..the works are keep
repeating for a month, at least im quite clear what im doing ...

nt having much great feelings, in the morning, the workers dont greet, not
even look at me , but they do greet those sitting bigger post, haha...nvm..im just
a temp clerk, it's normal.Today, a colleague scolded me by that way, i already felt
that he doesnt really like me, i did my job to him , i already took the notice,
i didnt do anything wrong of that, nvm...im just a temp clerk...

BUT, wait i become an engineer, thats another way round u guys look at me ~

Last 2 weeks, took part in Groove in Motion 3, i chose a gig at pub, but not
a church camp, means tat i didnt choose God either these two..it was really
that coincident, last year also facing the exact situation. The reason i didnt
choose the camp, it's quite simple reason, first, i dont feel thats my home,
really hard to join the fellas there, those who are elder, then really elder
a lot...those younger, really smaller till make me got no common thinking
or topics with them. Secondly, it's just very charasmatic way to worship
God, honestly, i already started doubt of that kinda practices. So, it's just
to be an outsider of the church.

Then about the gig, it's really exciting to get the offer and did really
appreciate that, even though it's a charity gig but it's worthy for the
time and money spent on that. For the comments of our shows, compared
with other bands, even though thats the 1st time we went to a pub
show, but at least we were quite clear on stage what we gotta do ,
for example like sound balancing . This was learnt by a lesson in university
before, which it might screw up a show, this is even more important
than a showmanship. We played pop and j rock, at least it's easily
accepted by people , and these are something we like too...i did mistake
for the 1st song , a bit disappointed of that, just becoz i changed the
pickup which got weird tone, and pushed it back then got mistake...swt...
need be more steady on stage...

then knew a lot great bands, exposed myself to them , quite happy to know
Awake, the guitarist got a cool guitar, nice ~ have the chance to be on stage
with Xerpent, opera troopers , ANK and Lang. The feeling is different compared
with dayao, suddenly felt that we are matured, because we've further
our first step in another music world.

Once Inch Closer , the band now is main on 4 piece, without keyboardist,
people might ask ...where is our keyboardist for those who know us ..
mm...he has been in a better place, ^_^

just 1 thing i wana say to him, " i did treat u sincerely, especially the moment
of ur big day, i just wanted u to feel happy ~~ "

On July, start to be RA, until october, problem is , if i really cant get
scholarship with my poor results, how ? what is next ? i also ....got no idea..

spent my time here without playing guitar liao ~~ but it's to update a bit..
not only let frens know my feelings or status , but also letting the future
of myself in maybe 4 or 5 months later know what im thinking or doing
now.

God bless ~~

master ~~

Everything done, 4 years Electrical Engineering course
came to the end, next wednesday the final job is just
submit my thesis book to the department, then i will be
the alumni of UM

but i decided to continue ....to further my study...~
everyone is shocked of my decision ~some asked y,
some already thought the reasons for me....
" is it becoz u want to avoid getting into society ?"
" u still wanna play guitar isnt it ? "

in these 4 years, i didnt really study..nt becoz
i dont like , just no target to study...when i wanted
to study when i was in secondary school, because
my target was ' get in university ! ". after that,
whats my next target ? surely cant always go
to 'study' only...have to chase after something i
never do b4 ~~

but actually quite regret, now brain still empty,
dont really understand what i have learned..
but when i internshiped, realized actually working
is different story of study...tat is based on
working knowledge and experience, but problem
is we need to have tat level of education to take
up tat job...the gate of getting the very 1st job
is surely the results...but after that, it may
not tat significant ...

20 years ago, a spm certificate is sufficient to work..
but what about 20 years later, when i thihk of this,
i better have higher a bit now since actually there
are a lot of master students too...whats wrong wif
tat ? when i say wanna take tat, ppl will feel weird,
it's something common lo ok ?

it's just 1 and half year, i think should be ok for me to
have this time to backup of myself again ...~_~

are we tat weak ?

huhu ~~

just 2 days , the stock decreased like storm, all seeem
gone...~~really shocked and surprised with all of it...
i know the reason, it's nt simply of 1 or 2 words , but
actually kept so long to wait till this day..~~

surely is He testing ....if not , situation wouldnt be so
critical...which would spoil up a lot of things...but what
expectation He waiting...i really dunno ~~ and lazy guess..
wait and see ~~

only my best fren knows what im saying ~

Dayao 2010 Photos ~

Ya, as titled, dayao photos...but it's only for my photos la...
hahaha...after reading cloud's blog..then my turn to lan c liao

P1: Ending of Dayao

P2 : i think i found something

P3 : Battle ?

P4 : just rest

p5 : AHHHH

P6: Fingers painful !!
P7 : the most handsome photo

p8: Cloth changed

p9 : donno wat to say ~


p10 : same pose ~`

p11 : with jason again ~

p12 : wind ?

p13 : all ss
p14 : nice flowers ...

http://de-cloud1231.blogspot.com/

this guy lan c 1st...~~ hahaha....really thnx to Li EE and other
photographers...really have a lot photos this time...compared with
my previous years ~~

Bye bye dayao

what time is it ? almost 3am ~~ i still havent slept ...still
havent cleared my make up...~~

just done it ...~~ finally done it ...~~ one of my frens said
i was very excited to do it...sure la...i spent 1 year to practice
guitar , then spent thousands ringgit for my equipments...actually
wat really makes me happy is like a 'dream completion'

remember when i was in 1st year, 1st time went to dayao
...sittingat 1st floor in dtc...too crowded tat time.. watching
the performances...tat time i still didnt know who those
guitarists like Alvin, Chriss ,Jing Lung...~~when they solo,
so admired at them.. then when ah foo's turn, he did bomb
the stage...he bombed dtc...too impressive ...this was really
so called Rock...~~ tat time i just could play acoustic guitars
with few chords....huh....i started to dream...if i was on stage,
how would it be leh ??

2nd year, palapes dragged me in dayao informally
without audition , and to be a bassist ...really insane...2
weeks to practice then on stage.....sure played very fundamental
and lousy things de la...and paiseh cz with shenan's band...he
got very high requirement cz his standard is another level d...
also thnx God, let me know him, let
me know the church which im attending now...

3rd year, mm....actually still not a band form...yun fei , wei sim
and palapes..we lack of vocalist ....and there's no band practice
constantly...always cakap cakap la...haha.....then dayao,
we spoileda song..... then i realized need to be more serious
on this...then i got jing lung as my teacher, he is very good
and patient guy...mmm...for me ...not teaching for money
lo...but really sharing his own ideas and knowledges to
the students .......and a lot seniors guided us to form a band
...like how to cooperate, how to practice...and tell us how to
solve problems....then i got jason in ... then kai wen....at the
beginning ....i jst let kai wen to be a sessionist , tat time c he
seems got no heart one to play band....but now he is one
of the soul in the band...and also my
good fren....cukup steady...

4th year....i like this year....a lot of gigs we going ...few
competitions we going...~~but everytime also mati
gao gao....~~ many problems...sound check problems...
then equipments problems ....and skills problems....but we did
gain experiences every gigs ...and it did help the band grow
little by littleunconciously ....

as i said it last year , i would bomb dtc this year !!!~~

thnx she had come ...finally she came....i know she would come....i know ~~

surely dayao is not the end....and i still need a lot lot
improvements...~~especially ideas....~~~

bye bye dayao !!~~ next year i sit at VIP seats lo....haha

Diary ~

tomorrrow early morning , 6.30am dayao photo session..
i've been joining for 3 years, but never take one...
but tomorrow maybe my 1st time to show up, fresh face
in dayao...i sure will be treated as the fellas who just
play but no contribution at all to dayao...cz never join
marketing drive , never attend a meeting ...and so on..
mm...nvm ~~ but thanks those who did a lot to dayao..

need to go the factory very early so tat i can see
those in charge of the materials...my thesis...start to
feel nervous...im too relaxing myself...too ~

mmk closing tomorrow....already no feeling ..~~
still remember when i was in 1st year...i involved
a lot ....multimedia especially..and i was the main
actor in the movie....really too much fun and felt
so proud of myself... after mmk, always walked
past bsg , looked inside who in...we always would
go back tat room when we were free...cz we
did spend most of the time when we were doing
our stuffs there.....ppl might ask y i changed to
become so active to talk....i tell u...becoz mmk...~
i grew ~

ok...talk about religion nw ..~ i got 1 question...
till now still not solved.... many christians did try
to explain it....they explain becoz they think tats the
answer ... by the way...the answer can be my weapon
to attack back...~

question is simple ~~ " why are there practices
whom the pastors use to annoint the people which
Bible never mention before ? " christians sure
know im indicating...for example , annoint by hands,
then blow ...then the fella must fall down on floor...
y must fall ? becoz need to accept the Holy Spirit ..
tats the common answer..tats the moment where
Holy Spirit comforted the hearts... but i've been
annointed so many times...really no tat great feeling..
my pastor told me b4...wait for tat....something will
happen...i did wait for an hour...ntg ...is ntg..~

As we refer back to Bible, ( i seldom read now )..
Jesus or other disciple never did tat also...they prayed
and did the healing....but no such annointing...~~ right ?

so i asked , the answer i got is new movement of Holy
Spirit...means He is also changing new way in the
new century... is tat acceptable ? it can be....

so can i ask also ....how bout New Age religions ? can i
assume tat Lord is now changing to build up a lot of
new age religions so that more people can be saved one
day simply because our God is loving us...sure i will be
scolded becoz i assume tat .....but my frens , how about
u assume the changing of the Holy Spirit ?

God is everlasting forever....changing ?...modifying ..?

Holy Laughter , not all christains seen it before, but
u may go youtube search it....or wikiepdia it

Holy Laughter

Holy Laughter is a phenomenon that occurs at certain Charismatic gatherings. Some participants (from a handful, to almost the whole audience at times) find themselves laughing uncontrollably for no particular reason, sometimes even to the point of falling out of their chairs and rolling on the floor in convulsions of laughter. This can occur no matter the topic being addressed by the current speaker from the pulpit-even when the speaker is expounding on such matters as Eternal Judgment and Hell. It is taught in such settings that this is a supernatural manifestation which indicates a special in-filling of the individual by the Holy Spirit. Although this phenomenon has been reported in isolated instances for the past 100 years or so, it first attracted widespread attention in the early 1990s as one of the typical manifestations involved with the Toronto Blessing movement. The most prominent individual connected with the Holy Laughter phenomenon is South African evangelist Rodney Howard-Browne, who styles himself "Joel's Bartender." This is a reference to the prophecy in the Bible in Joel 2 regarding the pouring out of the Holy Spirit. Those who are overcome with Holy Laughter at Howard-Browne's meetings are viewed as being "drunk with (or in) the Holy Spirit," and some do behave as if physically intoxicated, to the point that they are unable to drive home from meetings.

very long right ? i just summarise it ...means there's a spirit which never
being mentioned in Bible from 2000 years ago, but the Spirit appeared
100 years ago...mm...is it same like a new age things ? like my fren's religion
is also new , it was around the year of 1960..... we always say
tat Jesus is the only way...no others...becoz fact is not changing...~ but
why do the Holy Spirit change ? im scared....im scared tats not the spirit...
which my church now having it...i do prefer traditional way now...~~

im not scared to ask ....i hope all chrsitians ....just ask when u have doubt..
coz our God is true....not scared being questioned .... i still have some
questions...~ ask deeper...will help more...

Future

very long time didnt touch the blog...~

life becomes hopeless ~~...where's the target ...
wat do i want now ~~ these few days worrying of
life after graduation...~ after tat , need to work,
but got wat job to do ...this is the final problem
that finally i need to face it... world is so competitive..
dont know wat to say too...im not strong to
fight for tat meat ... ~~ maybe now class too less,
always alone at home , dont know what to do...
even no motivation to push me do thesis ...just
getting worried...

the church which im attending i dont feel tats
my home...im a stranger there...very very weird
everytime i go...really dont want to go again ~..

now we are crazy for music, obviously , in the
sight of other ppl , just wasting time , no bright
future , meaningless... but life is for us to enjoy ?
or blindly go towards ur target but after that
there's nothing , maybe only money in front of u ..
but u have nothing else ....nothing else ...

after watching 2012 , maybe even u have money ,or
already purchased the tickets, if both of ur legs not
stepping in the ship , u not considered safe ...just like
now u havin a lot of money , but u not considered
saved too... i heard a story b4, a doctor told a pastor
tat he was very sad....pastor asked y ...he said now
he has become a doctor becoz of his parents , actually
he wanted to be an artist. we may see his success ,
but has he stepped in his ship ?

ppl may think im optimistic , happy guy....
but the time im quiet is more than the period im
laughing ... -_- ~ dunno how to cheer up

it's time

im quite annoyed with the stuffs now ~

assignments...tat EC assignments....so so so difficult....i just know copying
since i was in 1st year...~ yeah...tats it....

for the competition...ya...sure i know not really got the chance to have any
prices...but i did still spend my time and money for practice and
jamming ...becoz i wanted to have a good show....but output is ........
" ah zau , i so ashame to admit that u r my fren at tat night ~"
i didnt know wat to response her....~ cz i also felt the same of myself
too disappointing...~~ i didnt blame the tech....becoz we r not
pro to handle this situation..keep blaming also no point...y didnt
we test clearly b4 starting ....

1 more issue ....want to make a big decision to improve the band...
to achieve an objective ...1 goal...1 expectation...
different animals put in a cage...sure cant live together....cz they
r thinking differenly....1 just want to eat grass...1 wants to eat
meat.... best way....kick 1 type of people out of my band !

i dare to write ...i want he comes to read....pls read my blog...~

do assignment 1st

i was lost, im coming back `

now holiday, is free to update myself ..

my fren did ever complain that she would close the blog if it
is written in English , sorry dude, pls close if u r reading now ~

" God gave Rock & Roll to you " , He gives us music ...
whatever kinda music ...how about metal ? is metal satanic ?
mostly say yes ...why do they say so ? becoz of the lyric or
headache to listen tat ? even a soft slow song can be written
as anti God song ...it's up to the idea of the song ...why do we
limit and restrict God's great work ? at least now i thought of
the answer for myself...haha....i do really prefer to all kind..
since He gives us rock ... just like He gives us water , so we drink

recently, im really busy...for study and music ...i joined the
band again...so we went for 2 gigs in 2 weeks....and the
performance always the day before mid term tests...so i
was always nervous for the exam on stage , not because of
the presentation...

the band did improve a lot since we gaining some experiences
in these few months...but it really didnt achieve a breakthrough
point...actually , a band is also same as the body of Christ , is
ONE ... the unity of the heart for it... if 1 christian not going to
church with a sincere heart, the church faces difficulties to grow
though just one .... many have been improving in the band ,
like yun fei , he's getting better to play bass ... kai wen is
contributing a lot of his knowledge and stable with his playing ...
jason is energetic on stage , and good in playing guitar too...
although drummer did mistakes for every performance , but he
comes with a heart to play.. dont feel like u r dragging others ,
but know that u have to get improvement for band....dont be
forced to lift up urself , my fren ~

now im getting my balanced point....it's like u want more positive
or negative .. i want to get to neutral... really hard to care for both
sides ... i just dont want myself get into extreme situation , as i
said , i know God has His plan and arrangement , why do i judge on
behalf of Him ? can i say those who dont know Jesus Christ sure r
bad fellows ? these people preventing me to get close to God , so i
left them ? or only worshipping songs we should only listen ? Oh my
goodness , tat may really keep a pure heart , but we are not getting
out of the world , but keep the world out of us ... why do we set that
for God ?

today i went to Glad Tiding , when i just entered the hall, they
were singing worshipping songs , i felt the presence of God was
strong there ...the flowing of the Holy Spirit was there .... i feel
myself refreshed again....great feeling for these 3 weeks i didnt
taste already...so long i didnt go to church for 3 weeks , i was
scared to go church, cz i dont want to drag the church...but Jesus
does love everyone .... He is willing to forgive ...He is waiting u to ask
forgiveness ...sorry Jesus...~~

my brother now has been converted ....he accepted Jesus Christ
to be his saviour ...it reminded me 5 months ago, when i accepted
Christ and he was still an atheist ...dont u guys think it's such a
miracle ? my frens thought is i who converted or forced him...i tell
u ...there's none people can do that except our Mighty God , only He
can touch people's heart.. we always sing the song .. There is none
like You ....tats so true ... my bro was touched by the Holy Spirit ...
there's no turning back when Holy Spirit came upon you , you will
be out of control ...

i may share my testimony again here... it's quite similar to his
..when my pastor , a fren and i were chatting in the church , my
pastor made an ending prayer , after that , she said " i feel the
presence of God now ".. haha...i felt nothing what ...and i thought
was present of God...mana hadiah ? we kept on our conversation ,
just a while , i felt tears coming out of my eyes, i feel nothing but
tears were going out...sure i controlled it...how could i cry suddenly
.....suddenly heart turned to a very sad mode .... felt so guilty to
someone....and i know that is God ...then i started to cry ....and my
pastor said again " tats y i feel the presence of God " ...

when an elder prayed for my brother last few weeks in a church
camp,his body was shaking and suddenly started to cry ...he could
feel the presence of God there too.....how could an atheist tell u that
he could feel the presence of God... his body couldnt stand of the
presence of the Holy Spirit , and i did always see some christians
shaking ....coz the Holy Spirit already came upon their bodies ,
actually He was there to wake up the spirit man who is sleeping
in the body for these 20 years ...haha... tats the miracles God's
doing....

b4 this , i was quite aggressive to force my frens to listen
or to accept Him... now i dont ...i find the best way...tats to pray
....not i convert them ....but only God can convert a human being
....keep on praying , christians ....for you love the people who are
non christians ... keep asking the blessing of God...in Jesus's Mighty Name,
Amen....

God loves the world ~

last 2 days , my pastor asked the youths a question " what Jesus
wants from u ?" they anwered " pure heart "...

then she asked 1 by 1 how to get pure heart...

when she asked me , i wanted to answer , but someone interrupted ,
so i didnt tell the answer there...

how to get pure heart ? ...my way now is " getting out of the
world "..rebuke many things in my life....i stop some entertaiments
like watching dramas...even quit my band ... just like a monk living
in a temple...

how i know is tat way....everytime i stepped to the world, my white
robe will be dirty, full of mud....everytime i go back home...need
Jesus helps me to cleanse ... just like a kid always goes out of house
and plays with frens....when back home, the clothes r so dirty..but
the mom still clean for him even though quite angry sometimes...
tats how merciful of a mother , nature love from God..

if i dont go out of house...i lost my frens....and im losing now....~
is tat the best way to keep ur children at home only to make
sure that their hearts are pure with no pollution....? will tat
child grow healthily ? or teach tat kid to be wise how to avoid ?
guide them to learn the beauty of the world....not in the house ~
the world needs the kids....to correct the world..world should
not be like this ....what's the contribution of a man who just
staying in house ?

parable :
wats the use of the most expensive fastest computer
if it cant be connected to the whole wide world...no
internet to update itself...who wants tat computer ?
how doest the pc feel ?

should i get back to the world ?

John 3:16 For God so loved the world that He gave His
only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not
perish bt have everlasting life ~ Amen ~

Submarine Christian ?

feel like wanna post a blog.....to share something

my very msg in my thought now is " be faithful to God ".....
for a sinner who like me how can say this "faith"...i dont
have it all time....im not obedient to His word.. what a shame
to see those really LOVE His word, keep reading the Bible...
i just spend very very little for Him....

"Are you a submarine christian ? " this question was asked by
an elder in a morning devotion... r u one of the christians who
just go to church every Sunday ? who just appear once a week
just like the submarine traveling under the sea, just come out
a while to ' breath ' then dive again ~~

im better than the submarine i know tat

but im on the ship without steering wheel....sometimes follow
correctly with the path of God....sometimes losing to somewhere..
always need people help me to get back to tat...after helping me..
i would still go another ways....wat a problem~ i know the problem
but still let it happens ....

we always pray..." Lord , let us get close to You...please !!"
He is there, and always replies " Come, Come to me ~"
after praying , then get on bed.....and He is waiting alone...
and He is still waiting ....with tear...and keep saying " Come,
Come to me ~"

do we do something for God ? do we ?

James 2:26 For as the body without the spirit
is dead, for the FAITH without works is dead also

Lord is faithful to us too...
1 Thessalonians 5:24
He who calls you faithful, so Who also will do it

only we choose not for His will
all time....we take it too light....so sad Father...sorry Father..
brothers and sisters , Father doesnt demand money from u..
He doesnt demand u to give Him big house to live ...
He doesnt demand u to give Him many maids to serve Him...

He wants u to spend little time to talk to Him...in real life,
if we talk to our father few words a day...i think he already satisfies
...this is what i didnt do at home....

He is faithful....because He loves u .....i cant think of other reasons...
He really loves u all....come on pls sing the song " take me deeper,
deeper that i've never been before, i just want to LOVE YOU more
and more "

maybe some christians think to be just a 'normal' christian...
just be ordinary...no need to be like pastor or envangelist
what is normal ? which is normal ? if u think u r normal just
to be submarine...pls ask Holy Spirit ....r u a normal christian ?

y my post sounds discouraging ....is that the best just praising
christians ? i dont really like to be praised too much since b4 i was
christian......if people dont know appreciating 'praise' ....tat fellow will
be sober or drunk of tat... ( haha ...not sober of Holy Spirit ah !) ..
pride will be coming......and will hardly see the truth and the glory of God...

forgive me i cant show the most suitable verses since im not good in
Bible...let me walk close with You, Lord....in the name of Jesus , i pray..Amen ~

i love Jesus

now im writing a journal " Growing with Lord "

it's started by April , how i was some kinda anti-Christ...
felt tat christians really freak and extreme all time ...
but now i become one of an extreme christian so called...
i didnt understand, but now i know the truth ...tat changes
me in these months

i missed too many great testimonies which i havent shared
in my blog, these testimonies all are so precious and worthy,
but how many readers appreciate the works of God , i just will
share to those who really want to listen and read it....thnx God..
i really Love Him so much since im knowing Him more and more
everytime...nobody can imagine how mercy He is , to forgive
our sins all time.. how great His love everytime just keep flowing
to us when we just voice and shout " Jesus, i love You !" He also
loves us , He loves everyone , not only christians , but others ...
those who dont like him , even heard His name ...people are
scared and angry, becoz His name Jesus is so powerful and fearful..
this proves how great our God is !~~

on the judgement day ...everyone will bow down, every
tounges will confess tat Jesus is the Lord....and believe me ,
my frens...He is comingsoon.....if u dont believe in tat, y dont u
TRY to pray tonight after readingmy blog and asks " Jesus,, if u
r really coming , can u pls show me ?" makestat prayer...im sure
that He will come to seek u ...just like when i reallywanted to seek
for Him just becoz i wanted to prove tat christians were goingto a
wrong way !~~....i've never cried for any other god....only i cry for
Him beczit's a carnal crying , not my mind to cry ....but my heart
, the Spirit man inside is crying when i have the mercy everytime...

i didnt think tat i was a sinful man, y would i think myself sinful,
i didnt kill , i didnt drink , i didnt gamble , i didnt commit crime....
i tot i was so good and clean...when a christian asked " where do u
think u going after end of ur life ?"my nature answer is " sure hell
..." becoz i myself also knew tat i was not asclean as God's favor ....
when i accepted Him and knew the truth ...i just found out all r sin
inside me...i pray Lord to help me...to cleanse me with the Blood Of
Jesus, to take away the sin...the desires ...in the name of Jesus ,
He helping me all time...

im not good enough...there's no stop love ....there's no end to
love Him... and i wanna walk right behind of Him...i wanna get
closer with Him... i want His big hug once only in my life....i
want His loving touch again... so tat i can really be a Christian~
Amen

Repent , my friend ~

我的心多么地痛，我了解了你的痛，真的是痛！当我才提耶稣的圣名时，
他说：
diu
u dun talk jesus with m
me
diu
diu
diu
diu
diu

可怜的是这种人在地狱里不停地喊着“耶稣，请你怜悯我吧！我后悔了”
耶稣的手流出鲜血，伤心的说：“　来不及了，你已经选择了”

by 22/5/09

dont think u r proud of urself...~ who r u ?

what a change !

this time not about gospel...~~ quite sad and disappointed to hear the
performance date is changed to 7th June....but im going to church camp...
this camp is important to me ....cz God is asking me to go....i must go...~~

but now....i got no doubt must go to the camp...but my band...they
gonna there themselves....im really quite worried of them..this is the
1st time our new band is going on stage....we should go together...good
or bad performance is we make it ...but i now left them...haiz ~~....i also
dream to go on stage again....~~

we still have time to make it perfect....c u guys again this sat ~

Great sharp words from Lord ~

last sunday, mother's day....a pastor from Nigeria, his great
name is Samson Dabbas ...y i say tat he is great ....cz he is ..~~
when he's praying for people.....his heart connected with Lord
...Holy Spirit can talk to him...he didnt say so...but i know ...cz
his words r accurate and sharp to everyone...

1st..beware of frens...many frens have discouraged me when
i started to share the words of Lord...everytime there's
argument i felt sad... but i must continue becoz i believe in u
Lord....u r the only God we worship..
non believers have lost in this world...even dating also quarrel
...where's the love ? only He is Jehovah Jireh , He provides
love to us...

2nd.." u r too hasty, wait for God "....how he knew im so
rushed in sharing to everyone...i was shocked with this ....
God asking me to wait...God has His plan for everything....
after planting a seed ....we cant leave it...must waterize it.....
but too much water will also bring death....~~

many great pastors coming next month....a pastor who
experienced at hell... is coming to share with us....his hair
turned white in 1 night...his face is burned ...so there's black
spots....who wanna come...pls tell me...God is real !!~

in the name of Jesus, Amen ~~`

爱

我又来分享了~~

马太福音 10：35 ， 因为我来是叫

“ 人与父亲生疏，女儿与母亲生疏，媳妇与婆婆生疏
人的仇敌就是自己家里的人。爱父母过于爱我的，不
配作我的门徒；爱儿女过于爱我的，不配作我的门徒；
不背着他的十字架跟从我的，也不配做我的门徒。得
着生命的，将要失丧生命；为我失丧生命的，将要得
着生命。”

读完了后，你们明白什么吗？耶稣在表达什么？为什么
家里的人是敌人，不能爱父母吗？这么奇怪的经文，当我
读到这里时，我根本不能前进，我读不到了，因为我不
明白，所以想等待牧师的启示。

其实今天我从早上八时，我和牧师谈了两个小时，话题
不在这个。然后，我和另位伯母谈时，令我想起两天
前的事情。当时，我想着救恩，因为我婆婆的关系。她不
信主，可能会去地狱，多么可怜。然后再想想我的家人，
妈妈爸爸，姐姐和弟弟。

突然，心中有一句话“如果我其中一位家庭成员上不到
天堂，我陪他们下地狱”。慢慢觉得思想改变，很乱，自己
好像很伟大，那么有爱心，跟家人共同进退。然后，那天
我做了两个错。至到晚上，想想这句话，发觉到我错了，
我不能这么想，恶魔找到机会攻击我了，只是说想下地狱，
恶念就慢慢来了。多么恐怖！我便改成了“只要我活着，我
一定要带全家人上天堂”。

那位伯母就说：“你把上帝放在第二，你的家人在第一”。我们
知道 everything God 1st，可是我爱家人多过于上帝了。圣经
并不是叫我们不要父母，遗弃他们，现在我领悟了。在上几个
星期，牧师和我分享了几个希腊文的字　“爱”，不同爱的区分

Eros- carnal love, lowest form of meaningless love-root word of
erotic sexual or sensual love among strangers or animals

Phileo -care and love among friends

Storge- love among family members

Agape - God's love ( highest form of unconditional love )

只要心中有主的爱（Argape) ，其他的爱就会上等级，比一般还
高。我把Storge放重了，恶魔知道我爱家人，用那来影响我。如果
我只爱家人，我害了他们，我会把他们带到地狱，因为我自己亲口
说了我会与他们到地狱去。幸好到了晚上，突然想法变了，可能就是
圣灵改变了我。我爱主，祂就是真的，所以我又信心带领家人到
一个很漂亮快乐的乐园，因为我有了Argape，Storge也提高了。

亲身领悟是不一样的，真理只有一个，难道爸爸拜神佛，我知道真理
了，但为了不破坏原本的关系，他有他拜，我有我主信吗？那么
我还有脸被称基督徒吗？虽然是我爸，立场不一，a man against his father
一切实实在在是主的爱。因为我爱我家人，即使冒险也可能要做。爱了
主，自然而然，会慢慢爱大家。

好想睡了，今天只睡三四小时。很累，谁不累，但别忘了主。奉主耶稣
名字祷告，阿门